Salary Negotiations

Three-and-a-half years ago, I wouldn't have imagined that I'd be writing the words salary negotiations in my blog. But here we are.

Reflecting on my journey to a career pivot, financial education was an important part of the whole process. Without this foundation, it's likely I would've sabatoged myself, as described in the beginning of this blog. Addressing and working through money blocks and negative attitudes towards money is actually the first step, even before enrolling in courses.

I don't believe in the popular concept of manifesting, but I do believe that you attract what you focus on. If you stare too long at the car parked with flashers blinking on the side of the road, there's a good chance that you may swerve your car in that direction without realizing it. If you have limiting beliefs about money, those beliefs may limit your potential overall because you won't be able to visualize success or imagine what's possible.

No, it's not an insane amount of money we're talking about today, but it's more than my childhood would've allowed me to accept. So, another financial milestone for the blog. In this uncertain world full of layoffs, rising interest rates, inflation and crazy prices on groceries, I don't take this for granted. I just wish I felt happier today. My mind is doing what it needs to do, but it doesn't have the luxury of happy.

How about you? have you ever found yourself faced with a big financial mindset shift?

The Podcast Playlist that Helped Me Beat Debt

Here's an article that I wrote that I unsucessfully pitched to a finance magazine. Normally I would've persisted and tried other magazines, but I'm taking online classes at the moment and only have so much mental bandwidth as they say. But I miss this blog! so here's a nice freebie for you today, no subscription necessary :)

The Podcast Playlist that Helped Me Beat Debt, by The Finance Phobe

One ordinary, groggy Monday in my cubicle, I was jolted by my friend's cheery Instagram post: Monday, favorite day of the week. Wow, I thought with a mix of admiration and jealousy, how do you get a life like that?

I wanted time freedom, tired of working full-time just to pay bills. My dream was to turn my favorite side hustle into my main source of income and support myself with a flexible schedule. A cash cushion would help me through the transition. But sadly I was a statistic, part of the 40% of Americans without the cash to cover a $400 emergency expense. What could I do?

I knew all the tips and tricks to save money but couldn't make them stick. Why was I constantly going in and out of debt and struggling to save?

I searched financial independence in my podcast app and started to listen. Here are the 4 steps that helped me make over my money mindset.

Step One: Take a look in the mirror

Mind Money Balance With Financial Therapist Lindsay Bryan-Podvin, Episode 08: Understand the Four Money Archetypes

This peppy, approachable episode is a good introduction before doing a deep dive. It explores four underlying core beliefs that can influence our spending habits and overall relationship with money.

(To learn more: Afford Anything with Paula Pant, Episode 127: Four Unhealthy Attitudes Towards Money -- with Dr. Brad Klontz, Financial Therapist) 

Step Two: Learn about cause and effect

Radical Personal Finance with Joshua Sheats, Episode 372: The Power of Cause and Effect

This episode asks the hard self-exam questions, for example, am I in debt due to a health event or chronic overspending? Am I not earning enough because of my skill level? Is my personality holding me back at work? I made notes in a T-chart when I listened to this episode, with eye-opening results.

Step Three: Discover my style

Choose FI by The Unstuck Network (hosted by Jonathan Mendonsa and Brad Barrett), Episode 134R: Quit Like a Millionaire | Kristy Shen and Bryce Leung

Kristy’s story of her climb out of deep poverty suggests financial independence is for anyone. Curious, I got Kristy and Bryce’s book from the library. It revealed the root of my struggle was trying to apply advice geared towards Optimizers, or savers, when I have the mindset of someone who’d rather side hustle than save her way to financial health.

Step Four: Chart my path

Afford Anything with Paula Pant, Episode 215: The Seven Stages of Financial Independence, with Joshua Sheats

By clearly defining the steps to financial independence, this episode helped me focus on the basics without being distracted by advice meant for the financially advanced. Taking one step at a time, I could happily build my emergency fund without being intimidated by stock tips and crypto clickbait (note to self, maybe skip that at any stage!)

Day by day

The world is in a battle now, saving lives and fighting disease. I am tearfully humbled by the sacrifices of the essential workers, from doctor to cashier. I’m among those isolating, doing our part to flatten the curve as they say but feeling like I’m not really doing anything, and having a weird survivor guilt about it. No monetary donation seems to be enough to cover it.

Besides donations, I am so not caring right now about gold can stay, despite constant headlines about recession in my feed. I appreciate all the acts of kindness and how people are trying to help out in whatever way they can. Urban balcony scenes of entire neighborhoods clapping to thank health care workers, and people making music to cheer others on are so inspiring. Small things help too, like a professional gave me a free 2-week trial of her online courses because she felt it was something she could contribute.

I got some help with the survivor guilt from a podcast, Episode 1024 of So Money with Farnoosh Torabi. The episode was about managing financial stress in a relationship, not where I’d expect to hear about guilt, but it touched on guilt some people feel because their businesses are surviving while others were financially hurt by the downturn. They had guilty feelings about earning money/ charging for their services. Sounds like survivor guilt to me. So it's not just me.

 

TL;DR I’m feeling short on social currency right now, in this new virtual world where it feels like everything. If you see a cute video in your feed of a cute family doing a #stayhome dance challenge, that’s not me. Here’s where I stand in the media world. I write this blog for myself, but try to make it helpful like a real blog haha even though I hid it in Blogger to be anonymous. I mostly use a private Instagram with 60-70 close friends, WhatsApp and Houseparty. Sometimes I make special Instagram accounts for a project/side hustle. Apps I don’t use include Tiktok, Snapchat, Marco Polo, Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest. My LinkedIn has 30+ followers, and my YouTube channel has one tutorial my friends helped me film. Before this crisis (and now when I can) I was studying to be a UX Designer and designing my own AR app. I admire YouTubers who enrich my life with travel videos, skin care tips, product reviews and helpful DIYs, and part of me really wants to join them, but I feel too private to put myself out there.

Social currency is not about numbers though. It’s about meaningful connection.

How do you feel about it? Would you say social currency is the new gold can stay?

Love to all and hopes for your safety.

2,235 and counting

A few months after turning down this job, I followed a link from msn.com to this MarketWatch.com article, How being a cheapskate became ‘sexy’ (Oct. 16, 2017). That was my introduction to FI* media. The timing was right, because I was finally ready for a change. From there my focus was climbing out of debt and getting to $0. Next came building an emergency fund, which never feels like enough, and planning to invest.

Does 2017 count as early majority FI? But this blog is late to the party, since as of this writing, there are 2,235 Personal Finance blogs in the Rockstar Finance Blog Directory (link on finconexpo.com).

The crazy thing is, there aren’t any other blogs exactly like this one. It’s amazing to think how many unique voices there are around some common themes. Learning Gold Can Stay is about crushing money blocks and allowing room for success. Yes, the struggle is real!

I’m training my high income skills as part of the process. One of these is copywriting. So those NYC poster ads with pouty open-mouthed models covered in pouty prose, like, I’ve actually been reading them. Just to see what’s current. Staring out the window riding by I’m thinking, someone got paid good money to. Write. That. And I have impostor syndrome why? Please tell me they hired that out on Fiverr…

My Intro to UX class is like meeting a long-lost friend. Like where have you been all my life and why didn’t I get to know you sooner? So if I ever go missing from this blog, you can find me learning wireframing or reading billboard ads for inspiration.

*Financial Independence, or Financial Independence Retire Early (FIRE). Is it a grassroots movement, or a trending lifestyle brand?